The language that we use can greatly impact our mood, and our mental and emotional state.

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The subconscious mind is an amazing machine and, even now, we do not fully understand how it operates.  However, there are some things that are known.  Our subconscious mind stores all of our words, thoughts, experiences, and emotions.  It is like a CD to which we are continually adding data.  However, in this case data cannot be removed.  Even if we change our thoughts, there will be a permanent record of our previous thoughts stored.  The second key understanding of the working of the subconscious mind is that it is continuously feeding our conscious mind every day.  It can only “feed” us based on something that has been stored there already.  This thought or emotion or event may be triggered by some event or it may appear to be just random.  However, the basis will be something stored in our subconscious mind.  These thoughts, emotions, and experiences can be positive or negative.  So, what does this mean for us?  Can we manage our subconscious mind?  In real terms the answer is “no”.  Our subconscious mind will “feed” us with a thought, emotion, or experience without our direct action.  However, do not despair as we can influence the chances of having something positive being “fed” to us by our subconscious mind by consciously being proactive, having positive thoughts and words, and having positive experiences.  The more positivity that we can bring to our subconscious mind the better.  In statistical terms, continuing with the analogy of the subconscious mind being like a CD and storing data, if the CD has one million pieces of stored data and nine-hundred thousand of those are positive then the chances of our subconscious mind “feeding” us positivity is strong, compared to if only half of the data is positive, for example.

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So, what can we do?  Life and living, news media, social media and all our day-to-day interactions can expose us to much negativity.  We cannot avoid some of that, at least, if we want to live lives with all its ups and downs, and the mixture of experiences and emotions that come with that.  To balance the negativity, we need to be proactive in finding positivity in our lives*, experiencing positive emotions, and thereby filling the CD of our subconscious mind with positivity.  One aspect of that is the language that we use.  The title of this article is “Mind Your Language!” which does not refer to foul language but the words and phrases that we use do affect our emotional and mental state, and are stored in our subconscious mind.

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Don’t exaggerate negativity

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We can sometimes be over-dramatic and exaggerate, particularly when referring to negative experiences.  Here are some examples:

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The traffic was a disaster.

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Was it really a disaster?  There are many situations and issues in the world that are disasters but was the traffic?  Now maybe if you have missed a major appointment, for example, then it could be construed as a disaster but while the traffic may have been “bad” it probably wasn’t a disaster.

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My back is killing me.

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Is it really?  Your back may be in pain.  It may be a bad pain but, in most cases, seeing a physiotherapist, or doing the correct exercise will help the situation.  It most likely will not kill you.

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The weather is miserable.

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Really?  The weather is not anything.  It is just the weather.  If there is a major storm that is causing damage, then the weather can be regarded as bad.  However, in most cases, we can stay indoors, or dress appropriately and we can get on with our days regardless of the weather.

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In these cases, using words like “disaster”, “killing” and “miserable” are just filling our subconscious mind with unnecessary negativity.  We don’t need to do that.

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Beware the “buts”

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Sometimes, we don’t accept a positive and look for the negative.

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It is a lovely warm day, but it will be cold later.

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Rather than reflecting and accepting the “good” day and storing that in our subconscious as a positive, we turn it into a negative by thinking about what may happen later.

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I would meditate but I don’t have the time.

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In this case, you will never meditate.  However, if you say “I will meditate and I will start with just five minutes each morning by getting up five minutes earlier” then there is a good chance of you starting.

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I would grow vegetables, but I don’t have “green fingers”.

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In this case you won’t grow vegetables.  However, if you say “I will grow vegetables and I will start by doing a course at my local college” then there is a good chance that you will succeed.

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Beware the “ifs” or “whens”

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Do we sometimes push our happiness and positive emotions to some time in the future.

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I will be happy when I get a promotion.

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I will be happy when I graduate.

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I will be happy when we go for a weekend break next month.

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All of these things may bring happiness and that is good.  However, what are they really “saying” to our subconscious mind?  They are saying that our happiness is dependent on the event occurring and, that means we are not happy now.  Therefore, our subconscious mind is less likely to find events and experiences now that will make us happy.

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Language construct or syntax

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In the English language, we use phrases such as “I am sad” and “I am angry”.  This is, in effect, saying that we ARE the emotion.  We are allowing the emotion to define who we are.  In many other languages, there is a different construct to these phrases which give the phrases a significantly different meaning.  For example, in the Irish (Gaeilge) language these phrases would be translated as “Tá brón orm” and “Tá fearg orm”.  However, while these are the translation, they literally mean “There is sadness upon me” and “There is anger upon me”.  This is a significant difference as it means that we are experiencing the emotion of sadness or anger, but we are NOT becoming the emotion or allowing it to define us.  We are acknowledging the emotion and, therefore, we can deal with it.  So, in English, for example, we should say that “This is a sad situation” or “I am feeling sadness” rather than “I AM sad”.  This difference will significantly impact our subconscious mind and our future emotional state.

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Conclusion

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Our subconscious mind affects our mental and emotional states on an on-going basis.  We cannot stop it from doing so.  We cannot directly determine what our subconscious mind will “feed” us at any point.  However, what we can influence is what is stored in our subconscious mind.  All of our thoughts, words, actions, and experiences are stored in our subconscious mind.  Many of these will be negative based on life experiences.  Therefore, we must be proactive in “feeding” our subconscious mind with positivity.  That does not mean that we ignore negative experiences or do not reflect upon them.  However, where possible, we must think positive thoughts, speak positive words, perform positive actions, and create positive experiences for ourselves.  We are empowered to do so.  Sometimes the language that we use can make all the difference.  Mind your language!

 

* Refer to my article - When I am simply grateful, life is simply great.